When I was a feisty young man testing ALL the limits I could think of, there was a song by Pink Floyd - "Be Careful with That Ax, Eugene" - that would crop up from time to time when the spirit of Dionysus was rampant. Do you know it...?
Today, however, it is likely to be Eugene Peterson who grabs my attention. He is such an advocate for the unique, misunderstood, quiet, sweet but demanding vocation of a pastor. In one observation he notes that it is so easy to get "trapped in the trappings" (as my mentor, Ray Swartzback used to say) of ministry. People want us to be "spiritual cruise directors" who are always available to soothe their wounds, hold their hands and listen to their complaints - often in their most self-absorbed states. And contemporary pastors, "before we realize what has happened, find that the mystery and love and majesty of God has been obliterated by the noise and frenzy of the religious marketplace."
Well, I made a commitment to avoid that dead-end - again. "Been there, done that" and I came to the Berkshires to be a pastor in the fullness of that word. And mostly I've found that what I think others want from me is often the hardest dragon to slay; sure, there are those who want to over-organize my time. But mostly, it is me who is my worst enemy - so I find that I need to spend regular time in quiet reflection and study in order to stay grounded in my pastoral calling. I give thanks to Eugene over and again for all the ways he helps me stand up to my own shadows in love as well as counter the sometimes self-absorbed and frivolous demands of others.:
...who is there who will say the name of GOD in such a way that the community can see him for who he is, our towering Lord and Savior, not the packaged and priced version that meets our consumer needs? And who is there with the time to stand with men and women, adults and children in the places of confusion and blessing, darkness and light, hurt and healing long enough to discern the glory and salvation being worked out behind the scenes, under the surface. If we all get caught up in running the store, who will be the pastor?
Lots of good sense there.
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