Decreasing so that they might increase...

One of my favorite "songs" in the Morning Prayer liturgy of the Church is known as the Second Song of Isaiah (Quaerite dominum.)  It is a long passage about seeking the Lord in the daily blessings while knowing that the deepest truth of God is simultaneously a mystery.  Such is the paradoxical truth of authentic Christian spirituality.

Seek the Lord while he may be found,

   call upon him while he is near; let the wicked forsake their way,
   and the unrighteous their thoughts;
let them return to the Lord, that he may have mercy on them,
   and to our God, for he will abundantly pardon. 

For my thoughts are not your thoughts,
   nor are your ways my ways, says the Lord. 

For as the heavens are higher than the earth,
   so are my ways higher than your ways
   and my thoughts than your thoughts. 

For as the rain and the snow come down from heaven,

   and do not return there until they have watered the earth,
making it bring forth and sprout,
   giving seed to the sower and bread to the eater,

So shall my word be that goes out from my mouth;
   it shall not return to me empty,
but it shall accomplish that which I purpose,
   and succeed in the thing for which I sent it. 

I have been thinking - and praying - these words a lot over the past few days of welcoming and greeting my first grandson into the world.  As those far wiser than myself know, entering this part of life's journey has to do with getting out of the way more than anything else.  For a generation my life was at the core of our family - I am the oldest son, the father, the husband - and it was my calling to help shape and guide my loved ones into strength and safety.  It was my burden and honor to shape their spiritual lives and give them a foundation for living into the world with compassion and creativity.

And now that is changing: more and more I am being asked by life to let go - to enter the downward movement of being silent albeit present - and to trust more than control.  In the gospel of John, the older man, John the Baptizer, says about Jesus:  It is necessary for him to increase and for me to decrease. And so it is true for those of us in the second half of life: we must learn to decrease so that our children and others might increase and come into their own authority with love, integrity and support. Indeed, I sense that this is the sacred role of the grandfather, yes? To watch and pray, to stand in the background with love and support, to cradle and embrace but never guide unless invited: this is what this part of the journey is all about.

This morning the reflection of Fr. Richard Rohr put it like this in the context of the 12 Step Program: " it is a “low Church” approach to evangelization and healing that is probably our only hope in a pluralistic world of over seven bill people. Most of these people are not going to “become Christian” or join our church, which even the Vatican now admits."

Our suffering in developed countries is primarily psychological, relational, and addictive: the suffering of people who are comfortable on the outside but oppressed and empty within. It is a crisis of meaninglessness, which leads us to try to find meaning in possessions, perks, prestige, and power, which are always outside of the self. It doesn't finally work. So we turn to ingesting food, drink, or drugs, and we become addictive consumers to fill the empty hole within us. The Twelve-Step Program walks us back out of our addictive society. Like all steps toward truth and Spirit, they also lead downward, which they call sobriety. Bill Wilson and :his A.A. movement have shown us that the real power is when we no longer seek, need, or abuse outer power because we have found real power within. They rightly call it our “Higher Power.”

I love Fr. Rohr for his gritty yet tender insights.  I appreciate his commitment to helping those of us who, like him, have entered the second half of life without healthy mentors and guides.  And I celebrate the way he challenges men like me to keep maturing by letting go of our old habits, practices and opinions so that as we decrease others might increase.

We "brought" Jesse, Michael and Louis home from the hospital yesterday. I wasso moved by her strength and commitment to bring her beautiful baby into this life.  She worked so hard keeping herself and Louis healthy. She remained steadfast and faithful through tough times and heartbreak. So when she walked into her Brooklyn apartment with authority and verve, my eyes were full to overflowing. This is her moment - her time for shaping the way of our family - her age of authority and power.  And my tears of gratitude said to me again, "Seek the Lord while God wills to be found... and embrace the invitation to get out of the way and decrease so that they might increase."

Today we will take some time away from all the changes - we must give them space to find their new rhythm - and let the magnitude of these blessings soak into our sols as grandparents. At this stage of my life, I have discovered that it is essential for me to take time in silence to savor and discern the presence of the Lord in the midst of life. It is a clear, sunny day and we will bask in its blessings before returning home tomorrow.  As the Morning Prayer readings conclude,so my heart sings: Glory to God the Father (and Mother) and to the Son and to the Holy Spirit: as it was in the beginning, is now, and ever shall be for ever.  Amen.