going deeper into transformative silence...

As a follow-up to yesterday's post about discerning, watching and waiting rather than rushing forward into action half-cocked:  Parker Palmer posted this poem by Gunilla Norris called "Inviting Silence." He notes that shared silence is a unique community event - a contemplative "action" - that invites hope and healing in a fractured time.

Within each of us there is a silence 
- a silence as vast as the universe.
We are afraid of it... and we long for it.

When we experience that silence, we remember
who we are: creatures of the stars, created
from the cooling of this planet, created
from dust and gas, created
from the elements, created
from time and space... created
from silence.

In our present culture,
silence is something like an endangered species...
an endangered fundamental.

The experience of silence is now so rare
that we must cultivate it and treasure it.
This is especially true for shared silence.

Sharing silence is, in fact, a political acdt.
When we can stand aside from the usual and
perceive the fundamental, change begins to happen.
Our lives align with deeper values
and the lives of others are touched and influenced.

Silence brings us back to basics, to our senses,
to our selves.  It locates us. Without that return
we can go so far away from our true natures
that we end up, quite literally, beside ourselves.

We live blindly and act thoughtlessly.
We endanger the delicate balance which sustains
our lives, our communities, and our planet.

Each of us can make a difference.
Politicians and visionaries will not return us
to the sacredness of life.

That will be done by ordinary men and women
who together or alone can say,
"Remember to breathe, remember to feel,
remember to care,
let us do this for our children and ourselves
and our children's children.
Let us practice for life's sake."

Late in the evening yesterday, after worship and naps and supper, I received an email from a person who had been in worship. I had encouraged the gathered folk to try to find 30 minutes that day to DO nothing. The writer wrote: Well, you were right, I didn't make 30 minutes. I suspect that was true for most people, too. It is hard for me. It takes practice. And commitment. And there is precious little encouragement for quiet waiting in our culture.  Small surprise when someone reminded me that nine years ago my candidating message was entitled, "Learning the Unforced Rhythms of Grace" based upon Eugene Peterson's reworking of Matthew 11: 28-30.

Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you’ll recover your life. I’ll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me—watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won’t lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you’ll learn to live freely and lightly.

So much has changed over nine years - and yet so much remains the same. Most of the time these days when I encourage Sabbath rest and/or the exploration of contemplation I sense a quiet but brooding resentment: we've HEARD that before - been there/done that with you - can't we have something NEW?!? Truth is, no: not only do I only HAVE one real message in me - like most preachers, I only share the same sermon over and over in slightly new ways - but this is the key to our healing and renewal.  Rest. Trust. Be still and know that I am God - and you are not. Middle class folk resent and resist radical trust (ie faith) unless or until we have a life threatening illness, catastrophe or tragedy. And even then, some choose to become cynical while others embrace denial in its many modes and only a few elect to go beyond the obvious. Many are called, indeed, but few choose to journey down the narrow path of trust. 

I closed yesterday's reflection with a thought that is changing my understand of my call: while the

life, death, resurrection and ascension of Jesus have a unique role in history, what is of deeper value for us is their metaphorical wisdom. My suggestion was that one of the truths the four gospels share with us has something to do with James Fowler's "stages of faith." Now some have suggested that Fowler is too mechanical in his developmental outline. This may be true, but he also offers us a spirituality based upon the work of Erik Erikson that is as useful as either the Myers-Briggs or the Enneagram.  So my take away goes something like this:

+ Like Jesus we all come into the life of faith as children: we are born and need nurture, love, guidance as well as the cultivation of our innocence and awe. This is the age of trust and mistrust. During this stage we will learn about autonomy and shame, guilt and doubt as well as the importance of initiative and hard work. Faith is simple and tender, a reality Fowler calls intuitive as it is based on a child's contextual experience.  As our childish faith ripens, it takes on a literalism that believes every word of Scripture is true. This is the mythic stage of faith.

+ In time, with compassion and healthy boundaries, we become an adolescent like Jesus: there is a gospel story of Jesus remaining back in Jerusalem after Passover teaching the elders. When Joseph and Mary return for him in a panic, like all teens he gets cocky and tells them to back off.  This is our stage of separation from childhood authority, where one part independence and two parts peer pressure launches a search for deeper truth. Faith here involves questions, rejection as well as yearning. Fowler speaks of this as a "synthesizing" stage where we draw from both questions and the wisdom of others as we experiment with making faith real and our own.

+ As young adults, faith is like that of the silent years in the story of Jesus: clearly he played with his tradition, took it seriously and even likely shared an apprenticeship with a wise elder in the form of the John the Baptist archetype. There is testing and evaluation taking place at this stage of faith, there is also the hard reality of developing a vocation, a public life and perhaps a family. The goal here, in the words of Thomas More, is to create a religion of our own. That is, to come to a personal sense of peace with a faith tradition and to explore in ways that bring us satisfaction. For a variety of reasons,some get stuck and remain as adolescents who are always questioning or rebelling. Whether grounded or unsettled, this stage of faith is all about personal meaning where some go deeper and others chuck it all away.

+ At some point, and in the story line of Jesus this involves the pinnacle of his public ministry, we not only face profound challenges but come to realize that life is not all about ourselves: more often than not this is midlife and we start  to question again all of the old rules, rites, rituals and behaviors in our quest for meaning and zest. Sometimes this is destructive, sometimes it is unsettling, but the quest is real. Some deny their inner longing and do not come to any deep sense of peace: in the Jungian world these folk become cynics or old fools. A few stay with the pilgrimage and re-enter faith with humility after having made peace with the fact that there are truths greater than our ability to comprehend. In this, I see both the journey of Lent as well as the Passion Narrative writ large.

+ And then there are those who embrace and encounter the resurrection and ascension and those who oppose it: some are illuminated and at rest and some are bitter and oppositional until they die. Only those willing to spend time in silence and uncertainty reach Fowler's sixth stage of "universalized" faith. Some are too easily bored or distracted to do this work. Others are too afraid or wounded. But a few, even through their brokenness, keep at it. In today's reflection, Fr. Richard Rohr puts it like this:

I often use this line, a paraphrase of Albert Einstein: "No problem can be solved by the same consciousness that caused it." Unfortunately, we have been trying to solve almost all our problems with the very same mind that caused them, which is the calculating or dualistic mind. This egocentric mind usually reads everything in terms of short-term effect, in terms of what's in it for me and how I can look good. As long as you read reality from that small self, you're not going to see things in any new way. All the great religions taught a different way of seeing, a different perspective. This alternative vantage point is the contemplative or non-dual mind. It is what we usually mean by wisdom.

The word contemplation has ancient roots, but for a long time it was not taught much in the Western church. Contemplation was finally rediscovered again through Thomas Merton's writings in the 1950s and 60s. What is contemplation? Simply put, contemplation is entering a deeper silence and letting go of our habitual thoughts, sensations, and feelings. You may know contemplation by another name. Many religions use the word meditation. Christians often use the word prayer. But for many in the West, prayer has come to mean something functional, something you do to achieve a desired effect, which puts you back in charge. Prayers of petition aren't all bad, but they don't really lead to a new state of being or consciousness. The same old consciousness is self-centered: How can I get God to do what I want God to do? This kind of prayer allows you to remain an untransformed, egocentric person who is just trying to manipulate God.

As Rohr concludes, unless there is an inner change born of an altered consciousness, we are

just fooling ourselves. At the same time, that altered consciousness calls us into

engagement with acts of compassion that simultaneously educate us even as our hearts are broken.

That's one reason why religion is in such desperate straits today: it isn't really transforming people. It's merely giving people some pious and religious ways to again be in charge and in control. It's still the same small self or what Merton called the false self. Mature, authentic spirituality calls us into experiences and teachings that open us to an actual transformation of consciousness (Romans 12:2). I think some form of contemplative practice is necessary to be able to detach from your own agenda, your own anger, your own ego, and your own fear. We need some practice that touches our unconscious conditioning where all our wounds and defense mechanisms lie. That's the only way we can be changed at any significant or lasting level.

For a full lifestyle change, I believe we need both action and contemplation. The state of the communal soul is the state of the social order. As Jack Jezreel, founder of JustFaith puts it, "The world cannot be changed by love to become just unless we are changed by love to become whole, but we cannot be made whole without engaging in the work of making the world whole. Personal transformation and social transformation are one piece." 

rest, wait and trust: sabbath thoughts about ascension sunday...

Today I put away most of my worship notes and simply spoke about the Sabbath connection

and Ascension Sunday:  wait for power from on high Jesus told his followers and then you can head out into the world to be my witnesses. And what was true then is just as important now. Wait. Rest. Reflect before acting. Don't go off half-cocked. Sr. Joan Chittister set the stage with this observation::

When society rested on the fiat of kings and emperors, pharaohs and queens, tribal chiefs and keepers of the clan,” writes Benedictine prioress Joan Chittister, “it was religion that built freedom and feasting into the fabric of our lives. When peasants and serfs, slaves and captives, bondsmen an indentured servants all lived at the beck and call of the chief, it was religion that built freedom into the very calendars of life for them. Long before the five-day work week and fair labor legislation, religion required rest and fun, fiestas and feasts, as well as fasting and prayer, discipline and self-control. The liturgical calendar superseded the whims and fancies of either the obscenely rich or the murderously powerful. (The Liturgical Year)

So both today's liturgy and message were fun - there was a lot of dialogue and congregational commentary - all of which felt simple and right. To talk about our spiritual tradition's invitation to rest is something I've done often, but it is so counter cultural.The Christian Century's lectionary commentary this week for Ascension Sunday, reinforced the importance of waiting and taking time with this survey of the sacred number 40. It is a call to pay attention:

In the scriptures, it is for 40 days that rain falls on Noah’s ark, that spies scout out Canaan, that Goliath fought the Israelite army, that Ezekiel lies on his right side (in mourning and prayer), that Nineveh is threatened with destruction, and that Jesus is tempted in the wilderness after his baptism. At age 40 Moses murders an Egyptian, 40 years later he meets with God on Mount Sinai; and 40 years later he dies.  For 40 years Israel wanders in the desert and for 40 years suffers under the Philistines. Saul, David and Solomon each reign for 40 years, and every woman is secluded for 40 days after the birth of a son. (Christian Century, April 27, 2016)

Nobody knows exactly why 40 came to represent a long time in our spiritual story. Some have guessed that it has something to do with a time that exceeds the 28 days of the lunar cycle. But no one knows for sure. “It is simply a mythical period pregnant with the religious future:  Forty (seems to be) the metaphysical delay required in all human experience before God’s intent can be realized… it is the legendary period of hope, the duration of either joy or sorrow, that opens us to unknown emotions and wisdom” born of the Lord. (CC)

So the oldest truths of the Judeo-Christian tradition give Ascension Sunday some shape and form by honoring the Sabbath and keeping  it holy.  Rest. Wait. Trust that God is God so that you don’t have to act like you are in charge of everything.  Wait for the promise of the Father. The second insight flows from the first: when you are well-rested, then you have the vision, stamina, peace and presence to be a good neighbor. What must I do to inherit eternal life – that is, a life of meaning and value – the lawyer once asked Jesus? To which he said: Love the Lord your God with all your heart, mind and strength – AND – love your neighbor as yourself. Everything else is commentary. As I know all too well, it is hard to be a tender peace-maker without being well rested.

Clearly having a few days away for rest and renewal helped me today. Di and I were given the

blessing of spending a few days on Cape Cod a a couple's cottage. As is often the case, we slept, talked, read, walked about and visited some of the beaches and bookstores in this stunning little corner of the world. Last year at this time we were en route to Nashville and it was becoming clear that one phase of ministry was ending for us both. Three hundred and sixty five days later - after a year of waiting and discernment - some of the new blessings of new ministries are coming to light. It takes time. And prayer. And trust.  

While we were away, I spent part of each morning reading and pondering some of Henri Nouwen's wisdom in Spiritual Direction. He writes that "prayer is not something that comes naturally or easily. It is something that requires learning and discipline... (because) more than anything else, prayer is primarily listening and waiting. We listen for God in an attitude of openness of hearty, humility of spirit, and quietness of soul. And we let our mind descend into our heart and stand there (for a time) in the presence of the Lord." Therefore, prayer is not fundamentally about the individual, but rather how each of us engages with the world.

Prayer is not introspections. It does not look inward but outward. Introspection easily can entangle us in the labyrinth of inward-looking analysis of our own ideas, feelings and mental process - and can lead to paralyzing worries, self-absorption and despair. Prayer is an outward, careful attentiveness to the One who invites us to an unceasing conversation... prayer is the joyful affirmation that God knows our minds and hearts without anything being hidden.

From this conversation that becomes a way of life, each of us finds a unique way to be part of the healing of the world. This is the other blessing that came to me while in contemplation this weekend:  as we wait for God's power from on high, new ministries are revealed. Nouwen writes:

Remember: You belong to God from eternity to eternity. You were loved by God before you were born; you will be loved by God long after you die. Your human lifetimes - long or short - is nly a part of your total life with God. The length of time doesn't matter. Life is just a little opportunity for you during a few years to say to God: "I love you, too."

So take all the time you need to listen carefully, yes?  On this quick trip away there was rain and sun, wind and fog, sand and water, sound and silence: a fullness for which I am grateful.

ps ` after worship today, three very different people  (between the ages of 30-40) made a point to speak to me. The first, a guest, said: You nailed that - it was a message I needed to hear - AND you were so connected to the people. The second, a person who has attended worship since I started nine years ago told me:  That was killer! I felt so good today BECAUSE I was rested and ready to engage. And third, a person who worships when possible and comes in from about two hours away: We in America rush to get things done on the weekend so that we have free time; in other places they simply do what needs to be done in an unhurried way and do it together. NO rushing. Hmmmm....?!?  Our homework assignment? Do nothing for 30 minutes today - I got home, had a quick bite to eat and slept for 90 minutes!

photo credit: Dianne De Mott

the insecurity of true believers...

As this campaign season has evolved - or degenerated depending upon your perspective - I have regularly been awed by the rise of "true believers" in both the Sanders and Trump camps. Mostly I have kept mum about this phenomenon, deferring to silence rather than sounding my concerns about this stunning loss of perspective. But I continue to carry questions in my heart about their bold and often arrogant assertions that their candidate alone (and by implication they themselves) posses a monopoly upon truth, virtue and promise. 

I am not questioning the energy or mojo Sanders and Trump evoke for the buzz of group think born of political rallies, stadium rock concerts and worship in massive cathedrals and halls is powerful. Been there, done that at Springsteen shows, anti-war rallies and a few evangelistic events. I know how energizing and ecstatic it is to lose yourself in a mass of like-minded souls who yearn for vision, cohesion and hope in a dysfunctional world. One of the reasons I am attracted to dystopian/apocalyptic movies like "Blade Runner":  comes from a deep lament over the brokenness of the world. So I am not questioning nor judging the angst and anguish of those drawn to these candidates.

Rather, what concerns me is their zeal that too often overrides reality. At times it appears in crude or rude judgments about the ability of those with whom they disagree to discern "the truth" of any given issue:  how can you support such a crook -  if you were a real progressive (or insert independent or conservative as you like) you wouldn't stay ignorant of the true facts - oh come on you know that is a lie, etc?  At other times, a uniquely naive albeit Byzantine parsing of reality occurs - think of the histrionics about super-delegates, the remaining Democratic primaries or the hypothetical polling results of how one candidate fares against another - that is tainted with an unwillingness to honor the hand-writing on the wall. And then there is the all out assault that both denigrates the opponent's integrity while dumping an avalanche of "facts" into the conversation: it is a classic bait-and-switch.  The result is always the same: rarely is there a measure of doubt or humility expressed about the possibility that Sanders or Trump could be wrong.

Perhaps the insights of longshoreman philosopher, Eric Hoffer, have been forgotten. Or the work Erich Fromm did after WWII re: the rise of Nazism in Germany in Escape from Freedom. In Hoffer's The True Believer he makes the claim that the unwillingness to consider alternatives is a sign of inner insecurity. And the refusal to accept the possibility that we are wrong about an issue, a candidate or a movement is more a social illness than a strength. "“Propaganda ... serves more to justify ourselves than to convince others; and the more reason we have to feel guilty, the more fervent our propaganda.” 

So I am troubled.  I don't experience or discern this taking place much within the Clinton camp. I am sure it is there because that is always true during an election. But the demonizing of opposition and the scapegoating that continues to grow in both the Sanders and Trump realm worries me. Hoffer got it right when he concluded:

The enemy—the indispensable devil of every mass movement—is omnipresent. He plots both outside and inside the ranks of the faithful. It is his voice that speaks through the mouth of the dissenter, and the deviationists are his stooges. If anything goes wrong within the movement, it is his doing. It is the sacred duty of the true believer to be suspicious. He must be constantly on the lookout for saboteurs, spies and traitors.

PS - In closing, as I have revisited my political history, I recall enthusiasm for George McGovern even while I saw him as a tragically flawed idealist. I had respect but only modest expectations about Jimmy Carter and later Bill Clinton. Must be the influence of Niebuhr, the insights of Dr. King and the experience of working with Cesar Chavez: we are all broken. How does St. Paul put it:  all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God. No exceptions - and that includes Bernie, Hilary and the Donald. The dynamics of the messianism of the campaign are not likely to change, right?  It feels like a Steely Dan song unfolding in real time...so here we go to do it again.

growing up while married...

Twenty one years ago tomorrow, Dianne and I were wed. It was a very small ceremony with three friends and our two daughters in attendance. It was celebrated outdoors by a waterfall in one of Cleveland's glorious Metro Parks. Afterwards, we repaired to our small apartment for an English high tea. When people ask, "Wow, you chose to get married on Cinco de Mayo! How cool is that?!!?" I would smile and reply, "Cinco de Mayo had nothing to do with it: one of our favorite songs is Dylan's "Isis" wherein the narrator sings, 'I married Isis on the 5th day of May, but I could not hold on to her very long...'" Some people dig it, but others just give me a quick, uncomfortable smile and quickly move on.

I married Isis on the fifth day of May

But I could not hold on to her very long
So I cut off my hair and I rode straight away for the wild unknown country where I could not go wrong

I came to a high place of darkness and light the dividing line ran through the center of town
I hitched up my pony to a post on the right went in to a laundry to wash my clothes down

She was there in the meadow where the creek used to rise
Blinded by sleep and in need of a bed
I came in from the East with the sun in my eyes
I cursed her one time then I rode on ahead

She said, “Where ya been?” I said, “No place special”
She said, “You look different.” I said, “Well, not quite”
She said, “You been gone.” I said, “That’s only natural”
She said, “You gonna stay?” I said, “Yeah, I jes might”

Isis, oh, Isis, you mystical child
What drives me to you is what drives me insane
I still can remember the way that you smiled
On the fifth day of May in the drizzlin’ rain

It is the perfect song for us: a mythopoetic, archetypal rock and folk song about Yin and Yan engery with a wildass fiddle weaving throughout while Allen Ginsberg dances around the band in ecstasy. What more could a couple ask for? It is all about living into the darkness and light. We've wondered whether life was worth living with - and without - one another. We've left one another. Regrouped. Fought and everything in-between.  And God knows we've changed over the years even if we've been "no place special.". It has been a beautiful, agonizing, sacred, messy, real, frightening and joy filled journey of love. I would never have "grown up" and gotten a little healthier were it not for Dianne. I suspect that the same is true in reverse.

We were two hippies of different ages when we wed - and that hasn't changed much Last year at this time we were on the magical mystery tour of our Sabbatical. We had a sweet little flat in the East Village for a week and went to a French restaurant to celebrate our 20th anniversary.  During that grand tour, we also bought ourselves new wedding rings at a Quebecois jewler - and renewed our vows later that summer in our Montreal kitchen. 

This year we're going to take a quick trip out to Cape Cod - I haven't been there since 1971 and it has been a long time for Di, too - and we've never been there together. The weather is supposed to be rainy and cold, but we like to walk on the beach and take in the beauty and solitude that rain affords those willing to brave the elements. By nature we are introverts and hermits - except I like to hit the jazz, folk and rock clubs of big cities from time to time. The art museums, bookstores, churches and cafes, too. Di tells me I've corrupted her over the years because she now loves this almost as much as me. Mostly we just like to hang by ourselves: we read, laugh, talk, walk and love one another quietly. Who knows what we'll find on the Cape - a quiet celebration for sure.

Mary Oliver put it like this:

Not anyone who says, “I’m going to be
  careful and smart in matters of love,”
who says, “I’m going to choose slowly,”
but only those lovers who didn’t choose at all
but were, as it were, chosen
by something invisible and powerful and uncontrollable
and beautiful and possibly even
unsuitable —
only those know what I’m talking about
in this talking about love

So I give thanks to this woman/friend/lover/soul mate as we honor 21 years of marriage. Here's one of many songs that have shaped and touched our commitment.

midday eucharist...

For the past four years, I gather with a handful of people at 12:10 pm each Wednesday for midday Eucharist. Sometimes there are as many as 12 but mostly it is 3-7 of us. We sit in the Chancel of the Sanctuary, listen to quiet music, pray the Psalms and do lectio divina together before sharing a sign of Christ's peace. Then, we gather around the communion table and pray the Eucharistic Prayer from one of the Community of Iona's liturgies. At the close, we lift up names and events for prayer before heading back into our work-a-day lives. It is, most likely, the most important thing I do all week.

It is also most likely what I love the most about church.  It doesn't take a lot or preparation: I bring the bread, set the table and pour the wine. I light the candles, unlock the doors and turn on the CD (often quiet jazz or Gregorian chant.) I clean-up and lock-up, too.  We use the same liturgy week after week, making only minor changes for different liturgical seasons. And, to be honest, I am usually stunned that any body actually shows up. Don't get me wrong, I am totally grateful, but the fact that people make a point to be present blows my mind. I guess, like me, it is not only a grounding in a crazy world, but a source of nourishment in every sense of that word. My week feels naked and empty without being together with this tiny Eucharistic community. I feel lost, too without praying these words:

Leader: The Lord is with you.

Unison: And also with you.

Leader: Lift up your hearts.

Unison: We lift them to the Lord.

Leader: Let us give thanks to the Lord our God.

Unison: It is right to give our thanks and praise.

Leader: It is indeed right, for you made us, O Lord, and before us you made the world we inhabit, and before the world, you made the eternal home in which through Christ we have a place.  All that is spectacular, all the is plain have their origin in you; all that is lovely, all who are loving point to you as their fulfillment. And grateful as we are for the world we know and the universe beyond our comprehension, we particularly praise you, whom eternity cannot contain, for coming to earth and entering time in Jesus.

Unison: For his life which informs our living, for his compassion which changes our hearts, for his clear speaking which contradicts our harmless generalities, for his disturbing presence, his innocent suffering, his fearless dying and his rising to life breathing forgiveness, we praise you and worship him.

Leader: Here, too, gratitude rises for the promise of the Holy Spirit, who even yet – even now – confronts us with your claims and attracts us with your goodness. Therefore, we join our voices with angels and archangels, who forever sing this hymn to your glory.

Holy, holy, holy God Ruler Almighty; 

heaven and earth are full of your glory, glory be to you, O God.

Blessed is the One who comes, who comes in the name of God: 

Hosanna, hosanna, hosanna in the highest.

Leader: Merciful God, send now in your kindness, your Holy Spirit upon this bread and wine and all of us that together we might be filled with the goodness of Christ Jesus. For now we remember that as Jesus gathered around a table among friends, he took bread and broke it saying:

Unison: This is my body, broken for you.

Leader: Later he took a cup of wine and after offering the blessing said:

Unison: This cup is the new covenant with God in my blood. Take it and drink to remember me.

Leader: In Christ’s presence we pray as he taught us.

Unison: Our Father, who art in heaven. Hallowed be thy name. Thy kingdom come. Thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread. And forgive us our debts,

as we forgive our debtors. And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil.

For thine is the kingdom, and the power and the glory, forever. Amen

Quiet prayers for reflection

Leader:  In one voice we pray together:

Unison: Lamb of God, you take away the sin of the world, have mercy on us. Lamb of God, you take away the sin of the world, have mercy on us. Lamb of God, you take away the sin of the world, grant us peace.

Leader:  Beloved, these are the gifts of God for the whole people of God, so come for all things are ready.

So we come... if there are only one or two who are able to be present, we simply visit with one another - check in on our lives and talk about our sense of the Spirit moving within us - before praying the Lord's Prayer and breaking the bread and sharing the cup. Most of the time, we crack open new insights about where the Lord is moving in both the Scriptures and our lives. It is holy ground for me - totally without value or honor in the business world - a waste of time and resources. But I wouldn't quit it for anything in the world.  If you are free, why not join us?

loving jazz casual with ralph gleason...

I got turned on to a jazz MONSTER today by my colleague, friend and master musician, Carlton Maaia II, during our weekly practice:  Jazz Casual with Ralph Gleason. OMG what a treasure. Toby Gleason described the genesis of the TV show for KQED-San Francisco:

One of his dreams, though, was to create a television series devoted entirely to Jazz. One which would allow the musicians the freedom to play what they wanted, for as long as they wanted; and allow the television audience to experience Jazz in a much more personal style than was being presented on television at that time. Jazz, when it was presented on television at all, was usually presented in very structured, formal, variety show formats. And so, Ralph J. Gleason's Jazz Casual was born. The series ran from 1960-1968, and aired on the NET network in the U.S. Thirty-one episodes were originally produced, of which twenty-eight survive...

Here is a collection of the giants of the genre at the height of the careers playing in a setting that was sweet and supportive. There is SO much more I could say, but why not just sit back and dig Cannonball Adderley playing and speaking with the ever suave Ralph Gleason verve and insight? This is jazz and jazz education at its finest. CHECK IT OUT!

every day is a winding road...

Today was just one of those days - total grace!  Most of it was given to the privilege of listening to people I love. From nursing homes and schools to our own church office and other places of employment, I had the chance to sit and cherish the stories of a few genuinely brilliant, tender, real and honest people who bring small but sacred blessings to the world. Their reach isn't great. Neither is mine. But at day's end, I couldn't help but rejoice over our prayers and tears - our laughter and confessions, too - for they filled this holy day.  On Sunday, for the Feast of the Ascension, I will read Psalm 47:

Clap your hands, all you peoples, shout to the Lord with a cry of joy.
For the Lord Most High is to be feared in awe... sing praises with all your skill.

And that's what I experienced today: people singing praises to God with all their skill. It wore me out, truth be told. Partially that's because I am getting too old for all of this, but it also has something to do with the enormous, awesome and fearsome power of grace. Such a privilege... made me think of Sheryl and Prince keeping it real with this song that gets it as right as any prayer I've EVER heard in church.  So now I am off to make some black bean ful and Israeli couscous as I share a little Cote de Rhone wine and candle light with my honey...

the mysterious challenges of our calling for those who listen...

It may be that in addition to sharing encouragement and grace with the people of my faith community in everyday and ordinary ways, God might have one more significant task for me to be a part of: helping our community transition physically, emotionally and spiritually from a "big" congregation to a small place of faith, hope and love. As I've written before, I knew that there was something that needed to change after returning from sabbatical last fall. And while a few of my uber-linear leaders grew frustrated that I was in a discernment mode - and refused to rush the Holy Spirit - by about Advent 2015 three things had become clear:

+ First, thriving small churches share a few things in common:  worship is a shared 
primary priority, deep caring and compassion happens better with a smaller size, mission must be focused and mutual, the gifts of the laity are honored and nourished, adults and youth are serious about deepening their spiritual journey, and thriving small churches are much more concerned with being living community of faith than surviving institutions. (David Ray, The Indispensable Guide to Smaller Churches)

+ Second, we won't make it unless we are tender and intentional:  Ministry, not money, must guide how we compassionately revision and restructure. It is an illusion to think we can simply shrink what is currently taking place to fit the pledged dollars. Rather, as the former Mayor of Cleveland used to say, "Learn to make poverty your friend." That is, with diminished revenues, reshape your activities with care and intentionality to do the ministry this moment in history needs.

+ Third, trusting God to redefine our ministry is crucial:  This morning in worship I interrupted my series on Palestine/Israel to open a conversation about discernment, change, trust and our congregation's future. Two fascinating comments bubbled up from the congregation:  1) nowhere in the Acts of the Apostles' text is fear mentioned; confusion, frustration, anxiety and uncertainty, yes, but not fear. And 2) even when St. Paul claims a vision - which he only partially understood - the leadership for implementing the new ministry was a total surprise. In this case, it was a wealthy Gentile woman (Acts 16)

Some of my notes from this morning put it like this:

Here's my take on this story:  confusion is one of the ways God gets us ready for a radical change, it takes the whole community to discern new directions rather than one person, sometimes we get parts of the vision wrong so we need to be open to surprises, and the ministry God calls us to is always about a life-changing alternative to fear, hatred, bigotry and the ways of death in our culture, because ministry comes from God.  

I concluded with an oblique connection with today's alternative reading from the gospel in John 5. The presenting issue is the way Jesus heals a man on the Sabbath only to be confronted by some of the rabbis. My point was that during times of stress it is all too easy to give in to our fears or habits or rituals. Clearly that is part of what happened in the group of people who came out of the Johannine community in Palestine.

Most of us don’t know that by the time the gospel of John was written between 90 and 110 CE, there were a variety of small house churches throughout the Middle East and moving into Europe that embraced boldly different theologies about Jesus – often in profound opposition to one another – that still found ways of celebrating koinonia – fellowship – with one another so that no one was barred from Christ’s radical table of grace and Eucharist. No one. Think about this:  according to the late Raymond Brown, the American Jesuit scholar who advanced our modern knowledge of the gospel of John more than most, by the start of the second century there were:

+ Three clusters of churches emphasizing different insights about Jesus that came from the Apostle Paul.

+ There were two geographic groups of congregations inspired by the teaching of John.

+ There was one group that honored the wisdom of Peter.

+ And another Jewish/Gentile mix following the more conservative path of Matthew and James

In some of these churches there was practically no difference between Jew and Gentile – both were accepted and trusted and welcomed in synagogue and ecclesia alike – while in others there was animosity, fear and eventually expulsion from one or the other.  In some churches women held positions of great authority, but not in others. And in some churches there was a grassroots internal organization while in others there was a top down hierarchy that called all the shots. In John’s community, which began in Palestine but fled to what we now know as Syria and Lebanon during Rome’s brutal attack on Judaism that began in 68 CE and culminated in the destruction of the second Temple in Jerusalem in 70, they began with love and cooperation between Jews and Jewish Christians. And this trust continued for a few generations. 

But as oppression from Rome against Jews increased – and as the small church following the way of John welcomed Samaritans and Gentiles into their evolving congregation – antagonisms broke out that eventually led to John’s people being prohibited from interacting with the synagogue and the dispersed people of Israel.  And that is why we read over and over again words in John’s gospel that are anachronistic to Jesus and portray him in opposition to the Jews. You see, by the time John’s stories were collected, there was a full blown family feud taking place between synagogue and church – and you know how ugly family fights can become, yes? Some of that venom was codified in the gospel where it continues to do incredible damage adding fuel to the fire of anti-Semitism all over the world.  

It took 400 years after the ministry of Jesus to finally cause an irreparable schism

between Judaism and Christianity because Jesus was a Jew who did NOT abandon his tradition and the early church knew it.  Please remember... even while John’s people were fighting their Jewish cousins, in other parts of the church they were breaking bread together – finding ways to share compassion and conversation in the real world – even learning how to agree to disagree in love.

That is to say, in all things biblical and theological, there is never simply ONE true way of being faithful – and our own theological history teaches this if we’re willing to listen.  After all, the deeper truth that both Jesus and the Jewish rabbis celebrated about Sabbath comes from the prophetic poetry of Isaiah 58:

If you refrain from trampling the Sabbath, from pursuing your own interests on my holy day; if you make the Sabbath a delight and the holy day of the Lord honorable; if you respect it, not going your own ways, serving your own interests, or pursuing your own affairs then you shall take delight in the LORD and I will make you ride upon the heights of the earth; I will feed you with the heritage of your ancestor Jacob… so remember: Is this not the fast that I choose: to lose the bonds of injustice, to undo the thongs of the yoke, to let the oppressed go free  and to break every form of bondage?  

In my 35+ years of ordained ministry my calling has shifted:  at first it was engaged with peace-making and young people, then it was grounded in making the gospel real in urban Cleveland, while in Tucson my ministry included music and spirituality as well as outreach in solidarity with the GLBTQ community. And when we arrived in Pittsfield, I was certain that worship renewal and celebrating a journey as an Open and Affirming congregation was going to be the core. It has been SO much richer than that including jazz, mission, lay empowerment and now... perhaps... a bold new restructuring that resonates with God's vision for us in the 21st century.