The poet, Mary Oliver, recently wrote:
The man who has many answers
is often found
in the theaters of information
where he offers, graciously,
his deep findings.
While the man who has only questions,
to comfort himself, makes music.
is often found
in the theaters of information
where he offers, graciously,
his deep findings.
While the man who has only questions,
to comfort himself, makes music.
We share a belief that the holy aches to be with us in our suffering AND brings healing to whatever is wounded – that is a core belief – something that almost every spiritual tradition holds as true. In the Christian world we say that in all things God works for good – NOT that all things ARE good nor that all things are as God wants them – but rather that God can take the worst the world throws at us and redeem it. That’s what the Cross tells us: even shame, suffering and pain can be transformed by God’s loving into something greater and even something holy. And when we discover the sacred presence in the midst of all our muck, it is disorienting…
You see, most of the time when we operate according to conventional wisdom, we don’t trust this truth. We live like God isn’t really God because we believe that we have to fix everything, heal every hurt and take control of our destiny because that’s what healthy, constructive and successful people do. And when we wake up to find out that playing by these rules still leaves us powerless over some things – or that being a “good boy or girl” has become destructive, addictive or even ugly – ooh Lord THAT is really disorienting. Cut to the music we’ve chosen for tonight.
· We began by trying to give shape
and form to the feeling of disorientation by using an ancient prayer – o
blessed fault - o necessary sin – felix culpa – with the weird industrial
groove of “Purple Haze.” If it
made you uncomfortable, it was supposed to because our hope is that this creates
something of the tension that exists in how God brings healing and hope into
the ugliest human realities: surrender
and serenity, you see, are married to acceptance – and this always feels
disorienting.
· As the
music continues it tells us that we live in a “Mad World.” We may start to know that something is going wrong
and want to “get outta Dodge,” but we don’t know where to go – and don’t know
what to do – so we keep on keeping on and “Keep the Car Running” even when bad
becomes worse. If nothing changes we wake up to discover that all our “Roads” lead to despair – and we find
ourselves “At the Bottom of the River.”
More often than not, it is only when we run out of options – when we
have no more “High Hopes” – that we let God greet us with grace and begin
to sense that even in our worst moments, God doesn't give up on us
This is a truth found in all spiritual tradition: In
Judaism this truth is honored
in the observation of Passover, in Islam in the stories
of Allah’s guidance thatleads the Prophet through his darkest hour, in Buddhism it comes when Siddhartha endures the fears of illusion before enlightenment
awakens and in Christianity it takes place between Good Friday and
Easter. We’re talking about an emptying
– a hitting bottom – that is never just about us but always pregnant with grace
bringing light into the darkness.
Hope is an orientation of the
spirit, an orientation of the heart; it transcends the world that is
immediately experienced and is anchored somewhere beyond its horizons. . . It
is not the conviction that something will turn out well, but the certainty that
something makes sense regardless of how it does turns out.
· Tonight’s program
will be like going to MassMoCA – you will probably love parts and hate parts
and not grasp what the devil is going on in other parts – that happens to me
every time I go there. And that’s ok, it
is part of the creative process. Give
yourself time to wrestle with it all.
· If you’ve brought
a donation – or money or toilet paper – there are places you may leave your
gift, ok? Towards the end of the
evening, when we are playing “Don’t Give Up,” if you feel inspired to light a
candle as a prayer – or a sign of protest against the darkness – please feel
free to come forward and do so.
· And when
everything is done, and the band has left the Chancel, you are welcome to sit
here for a time in the quiet – or share a conversation about what touch you in
all of this. Give yourself time to let
it simmer.
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