Interestingly - at least to me - after my earlier posting I read these words on Fr. Richard Rohr's daily meditation. They amplify and deepen what I was trying to say so I offer them as part two...
The compassionate
holding of seeming meaninglessness or tragedy, as Jesus does in hanging on the
cross, is the final and triumphant resolution of all dualisms and dichotomies. (Friday)
Rest: Tonglen
Tibetan Buddhist
teacher, Pema Chödrön, shares the practice of tonglen as a way of holding suffering and awakening
compassion:
“In order to have
compassion for others, we have to have compassion for ourselves.
“In particular, to
care about other people who are fearful, angry, jealous, overpowered by
addictions of all kinds, arrogant, proud, miserly, selfish, mean—you name it—to
have compassion and to care for these people, means not to run from the pain of
finding these things in ourselves . . . . Instead of fending it off and hiding
from it, one could open one’s heart and allow oneself to feel that pain, feel
it as something that will soften and purify us and make us far more loving and
kind.
“The tonglen practice
is a method for connecting with suffering—ours and that which is all around
us—everywhere we go. It is a method for overcoming fear of suffering and for
dissolving the tightness of our heart. Primarily it is a method for awakening
the compassion that is inherent in all of us, no matter how cruel or cold we
might seem to be.
“We begin the practice
by taking on the suffering of a person we know to be hurting and who we wish to
help. For instance, if you know of a child who is being hurt, you breathe in
the wish to take away all the pain and fear of that child. Then, as you breathe
out, you send the child happiness, joy, or whatever would relieve their pain.
This is the core of the practice: breathing in others’ pain so they can be well
and have more space to relax and open, and breathing out, sending them
relaxation or whatever you feel would bring them relief and happiness. However,
we often cannot do this practice because we come face to face with our own
fear, our own resistance, anger, or whatever our personal pain, our personal
stuckness, happens to be at that moment.
“At that point you can
change the focus and begin to do tonglen for what you are feeling and for
millions of others just like you who at that very moment of time are feeling
exactly the same stuckness and misery. Maybe you are able to name your pain.
You recognize it clearly as terror or revulsion or anger or wanting to get
revenge. So you breathe in for all the people who are caught with that same
emotion and you send out relief or whatever opens up the space for yourself and
all those countless others. Maybe you can’t name what you’re feeling. But you
can feel it—a tightness in the stomach, a heavy darkness, or whatever. Just
contact what you are feeling and breathe in, take it in—for all of us and send
out relief to all of us.
“. . . [You] can do
tonglen for all the people who are just like you, for everyone who wishes to be
compassionate but instead is afraid, for everyone who wishes to be brave but
instead is a coward. . . .
“Breathe in for all of
us and breathe out for all of us.
“Use what seems like
poison as medicine. Use your personal suffering as the path to compassion for
all beings.”
Adapted from “The Practice of Tonglen” by
Pema Chödrön,
Shambhala.org
Shambhala.org
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