Monday, August 21, 2017

we create a cleavage when we want to do good things for people...

This simple quote from Jean Vanier of L'Arche has been my constant companion in meditation for the past week:

Can we accept people with disabilities as they are? When we want to change people, we have power. We have generosity. We have goodness. But we create a cleavage when we want to do good things for people.
 
More than any other writer - Nouwen, Rohr, Buechner or Norris combined - this quote captures the essence of living into the upside-down kingdom of God as expressed and celebrated by Jesus. It is the KEY to living into the "unforced rhythms of grace." It is HOW I can experience the "peace that passes all understanding." And it is the WAY to live with energy and verve - even in my brokenness - rather than the exhaustion that has so often haunted my life of faith. For almost 20 years, Peterson's reworking of Matthew 11:28-30 has spoken to me:

Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you’ll recover your life. I’ll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me—watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won’t lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you’ll learn to live freely and lightly.


Two years ago on sabbatical, I discovered how tired I was. Exhausted. Some have even suggested burned out. I slept and slept and slept. At first, I blamed the ministry, but that was only partially true. Then I took aim at the church, but the Body of Christ was not the real culprit. No, I was raised on a gospel of doing: if I wasn't actively trying to fix something - or help someone - or solve some social issue, I was wasting my time and God's love. Yes, there is a call to sabbath rest. Of course, I knew all about quiet time and the Psalmist's song to "be still and know that I am God." But apparently, I didn't believe it. That is, trust it. So, I had to run out of gas in every conceivable way before I was open to hearing what Jesus was actually teaching - and why it is the fount of every blessing.

Vanier cuts to the chase: not only do we create a cleavage by all our striving, but we wear ourselves out, too.  This past week as we spent time caring for our beloved grandson, my only job was to love this little soul. Not fix him when he was hurting. Not try to replace his momma or poppa when he was missing them. And certainly not try to change anything about this precious boy who is bright, compassionate, witty and oh so loving. No, my gift from God was just to love him. Be present with him. Cherish him as he is - and it was glorious. Full, demanding and sacred - and glorious.

So so it is with living into the wisdom of Christ: be real - be present - and do it from your heart. "All of us," Vanier writes, "have a secret desire to be seen as saints, heroes, martyrs. We are afraid to be children, to be ourselves.” The way of striving is exhausting. Love is so much easier - and so much better.

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