learning to let go...

Ash Wednesday 2019 has come and gone: it was, for me, a small, slow time of walking through the day with Jesus. Given the wintry cold, I chose to worship with my friends in NYC via the miracles of the Internet. Earlier in the day I wrote and prayed in silence. As the day ripened, I spent time with Jean Vanier's exposition of St. John's mystical gospel. And in the evening, I listened and prayed the prayers of confession that give shape and form to a spirituality of emptiness. That is my take on Lent this year for me: letting go. I don't sense that the Lenten journey is about taking more things on - or in - rather I find its time to let more things go. 

Cynthia Bourgeault calls this "putting on the whole mind of Jesus." Taking a cue from St. Paul's song of relinquishment in Philippians 2 she suggests that the life of Jesus was all about Jesus letting go. 

If then there is any encouragement in Christ, any consolation from love, any sharing in the Spirit, any compassion and sympathy, make my joy complete: be of the same mind, having the same love, being in full accord and of one mind. Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility regard others as better than yourselves. Let each of you look not to your own interests, but to the interests of others. Let the same mind be in you that was in Christ Jesus, who, though he was in the form of God, did not regard equality with God as something to be exploited, but emptied himself, taking the form of a slave, being born in human likeness. And being found in human form, he humbled himself
and became obedient to the point of death—even death on a cross.

Kenosis is what it is called in academic theology- self-emptying - relinquishing. I like the direct simplicity of the 12 Step movement that emphasizes the serenity that can be ours as we learn to accept the things we cannot change, claim the courage to change what we can and the wisdom to distinguish the one from the other. This too is what it means to put on the whole mind of Christ. (For those who would like to explore this at a deeper level, please check out Bourgeault's excellent four part Youtube lecture on kenosis and centering prayer @ https:
//www.youtube.com/watch?v=TufpAQUXpTo)

Now I have always been drawn to Jesus. My spirituality and practices are guided by an intimacy with him in my heart, mind and soul. This Lent I find that I am being called to spend more time in his presence, too. Not the presence of the institutional church - although being connected horizontally in worship still matters to me - and not at all the company of the church's bureaucracy. Just some alone time with Jesus - probably in the wilderness - or at the feasts with Magdalene and Mary and Martha. A poem I came across this morning by Fr. Daniel Berrigan rings true for me.

I can only tell you what I believe; I believe:
  I cannot be saved by foreign policies.
  I cannot be saved by the sexual revolution.
  I cannot be saved by the gross national product.
  I cannot be saved by nuclear deterrents.

I cannot be saved by aldermen, priests, artists,
plumbers, city planners, social engineers,
  nor by the Vatican,
  nor by the World Buddhist Association,
  nor by Hitler, nor by Joan of Arc,
  nor by angels and archangels,
  nor by powers and dominions,
I can be saved only by Jesus Christ.

By saved I mean made whole and redeemed from the clutches of a culture that is too busy, too loud and too fast. Jesus lets all of that go. He relinquishes his place in the cacophony. He wanders around for a spell in the wilderness being ministered to by angels and God's critters. And, when he's ready, returns to the cities periodically before heading back to the mountains, lakes, deserts and lonely places to be "chill." To slow down and let go. To reclaim the whole mind of Christ.

During Lent 2019, that's what I'm doing, too.

credits:
+ https://www.pinterest.com/pin/565694403190844012/
+ http://www.metanetworks.org/modern-jesus-art/
+ https://www.patheos.com/blogs/teachingnonviolentatonement/2018/02/sermon-jesus-teaches-disciples-something-totally-new/